Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Tattle Tale

A woman, around 45 years old, at my 8 top ordered an 8 oz end cut prime rib.  I explained how that was going to look being only 8 oz, but that's what she wanted, so that's what she got.  When she received her salad she had me run back three separate times for ranch...all for the same freaking salad.
 When her meal was delivered she requested horseradish.  "Would you like fresh cut, or the creamy dill?"  She chose fresh cut. When I bring it to her,  she decides she also would like to  have the creamy dill.  Okay.  I return with it, and whatdayaknow...she needs ranch.  For what, I have no idea.
I check on the table, filling up teas and waters, two or three times and all seems well.  Then I see her following me up the other isle and catches me in the back of the restaurant.  
She whisper giggles, "I don't care for the prime rib.  I think it's because it's the end cut."  
Me, "I'll be happy to take it back and get you get a regular 8 oz cut with a fresh baked potato."  (fake smile)
Her:  "No!!  I don't want the kitchen to know I don't like it."
Me:  "No problem.  I'll have my manager take of it for you."
Her:  "NO!  Oh please, don't tell anyone at all.  I'll just pay for my baked potato and salad."  
Me:  "Ma'am, I can't take anything off the ticket without a manager because of how our system is set up."  
Her:  "Okay, just go tell the kitchen you need a new 8 oz prime rib and they'll just give it to you, then you bring it out to me!"  Giggle, giggle.
<THUD>  REALLY?  
Me:  "Okay, sure.  No problem."  
She giggles and sneaks back to her table.  
I instantly grab our FOH and tell her the whole exchange.  After we both roll our eyes, she gets her new 8 oz prime rib and new potato...and yes, new fresh and creamy horseradish, and side of ranch.  
When I bring the bill (all separate, of course), her total was $0.00.  FOD comped the whole thing.  I thought I'd be looking a great tip here....She thinks I kept her dumbass secret and now her bill is ZERO. And that's what she left me ZERO.  

Fucking bitch.  

Hello, I'll Be Taking Care of You This Evening...

I'm a bit in the weeds, so while you wait please enjoy (or not, I don't really care) this lovely Bloomin Onion...it is NOT gluten free....no, not even if you dip it in Thousand Island dressing instead of the Bloom Sauce.  I'll check back in a few.